The games people play

In my last blog I was ill-tempered and outrageous, I want to apologize for the way it came out but I dont apologize for the message I was trying to get across. I just feel like if your sleeping with someone and they decide they are going to start talking to someone else you should be made aware of if and allowed to decide whether you want to remain in the same situation. I have a strong fear of diseases and I dont wish to deal with anyone who could possibly be kissing, sucking or fucking someone else. Lemme tell you how trust and honesty go hand in hand in what is supposed to be an Open situation. I dont really know what to call it but ok here: If you decide we are gonna continue to have sex with me I think the least you can do/we can do is to be honest and open about whats going on between the both of us. It's a situation where should we decide to deal with other people neither parties can get mad and I respect that..but when you dont come to me and tell me that your interested in, and pursing someone while your laying in my bed and kissing my lips and fucking me..there is a problem. I should NOT have to find out from anyone else...Why must I always be the goddamn last to know shit. && for the simple fact that it wasnt brought to my attention from jump, I refuse to believe shit you have to say after the fact. I'm supposed to believe you havent been having sex with her?? Yea right. Since when? It aint like ya'll aint had sex before...&& ya'll wasnt in a relationship fuck is stopping you now?? Right. && if you werent even gonna tell me u were dealing with her like that..why should I believe that you would come to me and tell me you are having sex with someone else? If you call yourself being open and honest you shouldnt have to hide shit. && If it's not that serious then you wouldve volunteered the information. All in all it's a lack of respect for me that made you feel as though you have done NO wrong in this situation and that's sad. Your the ONLY person who thinks it's ok and it's not. Pretty pathetic. How the fuck am I supposed to believe you wont bring her around my daughter?? That ya'll not sharing a bed with Kennedy in it?? When you didnt have the decency to keep me informed in the first place. I cant believe shit you say. To me your just making it worst. Omission is betrayal. Not saying the whole truth or volunteering the whole story is lying. I know too many liars and up until now you fooled the shit outta me. Your just like them, no better.

I dont have to be nice to anyone. You hurt me and keep on hurting me knowing that you are HURTING me and expect me to be nice to you. && Claim that you dont mean to but you keep on doing it?? Makes no sense. A contridiction. You dont owe me anything..but I give you the truth..I give you respect and loyalty and all I have ever asked for in our friendship and whatever else has taken place was for the reciprocation and you have failed over and over to give it to me. No more words are left. My loyalty is fading with the quickness, my heart is becoming hardened in regards to you with repeated disappointments and poor excuses of how your not like everyone else. When does COMMON sense enter YOUR picture?? You cant possible be that dumb. U must like the shit outta drama but I spent the last two years trying my best to stay away from it and now dealing with u I'm once again all up in the mix. Never once a heartfelt apology for anything. I cant believe you dont think you owe me that...outta all the shit we done been through over the last 7 almost 8 months...u dont feel responsible for anything?? That's fine. But your burning your bridges for lack of a better word and when she fucks you over and shit dont work out I wont be waiting in the wings for you. So dont look for me. I'm tired of playing this game and I'm over you pretending your innocent and that I brought it all on myself. The same way I was aware of what I was getting myself into although my expectations may differ from yours, you, also, were well aware of the type of person I am and you knew what to expect. You have been around LONG enough to know. Definately feeling some kind of way. And Betrayal is only the beginning of what I feel. Always had your best interest at heart. Always. Feed me lies about how you dont want to bring blah blah blah in my life and how you want to get your shit together...blah blah blah instead of just saying what you really feel..going hard and keeping it 100 and saying YOU JUST DIDNT WANT ME FROM THE BEGINNING. You wouldve saved yourself alot of headaches.